---

“A Satire”

Bridewell1 I come be valient muse and strip

ride naked in despite of Bridewells whip.

Goe to the Court let those above us knowe

they have theire faults as well as we belowe.

Goe tell the great ons, theire greatnes of blood

5

is but false greatnes, their greatnes understood.

The Noble are the virtuous, honour from mudd

and clay is base, those greatest that are good.

Some have heigh place by birth, some lands advance

Some climbe by witt, some are made great by chance

10

I know a man made lord for his good face

whoe scarce had witt for to supplie that place.2

another loth that name to undertake

must needs be lorded for his ladies sake.3

a third that could not such promotion gett

15

a thousand find to be a Baronett.4

a fourth not mov’d with an ambitious spright

was well content to be a common knight.5

Honors a hackney,6 offices for gould

like common jades in faires are bought and sould.

20

Let none despaire. asses and fooles inheritt

Fortune advanceth more then witt or meritt

all this in forraine states I see, with us

none are advanced but the virtuous.

England thou art not soyld with spotts like these

25

thou art not given to flattery, pride, nor ease

Thy Ladies there with there one lords doe lie

thy Court is chaster then a nunnery.

mariage is there not made a slipperie knott

of fast and loose, but in the generall lott

30

she that doth draw a blank, an eunuch wedd7

is as well pleas’d to keepe her meaden head

as if she had mett with Hercules stronge flame

as a lawfull prize to rob her of the same

She dares not blase her lust to breath the fame

35

She had rather loose her pleasure then her name.

There is noe fashion? all with them is union

they speake one truth and are of one religion

Theire foxes suck not out the poore lambes blood

nor private ends are made the publick good.

40

But all are for the generall all agree

like bells and bagpipes in one hermonie.

The sacred seate of justice Joves Rare throne

is not infected with corruption.

The judges cannot err nor slip aside

45

where righteous angells are their daylie guide.

the seales are just, noe bribes corrupt the lawes

justice eies noe man but lookes on the cause.

Has’t thou a suite requireth equitie?

Committ it to the righteous Chancery.8

50

Thou shal’t not find it there last halfe soe longe

as thy Buffe Jerkin9 that is tough and stronge.

Nor shall find alminacks10 weare out of date

before that courte doe sentance thy debate

Thy beard shall not turne gray nor state be reard

55

or gag’d or spent before thy cause be heard.

Ther’s noe such triflinge, these dispatches goe

faster then mills, when stubborne winds doe blow.

The racks ride not soe fast as doth the cause11

pegasus12 goes slowlie to the swift paced lawes.

60

Conscience provokes their speed, before thou spend

a double fee thy cause is at an end.

Looke heigher muse & cast a modest eie

into the Churche and veiwe her puretie

is she defil’d with superstition13

65

or antique shapes of old devotion

is ceremonie impos’d to sanctetie

or onely urg’d to teach conformitie

doe any climbe up to the pulpitts steares

more by theire purse then by theire zealous prayers

70

O god forbidd but pulpitts should be free

from flatteringe falshood, pride and simony.14

dare any bribe the usher or the page

for the next advowson15 of a vicarage:

dares any preach against a vitious life

75

and be the first will kis his neighbours wife

Does profitt at a Bishops conscience knock

and bidd him sheere the sheepe and pine the flock.

whoe flatters less; Doe cleargie men agree?

to make a baude of theire devinetie?

80

ah noe o noe our reverend Churchmen dare

boldly tell absalon of his longe haire16

These tent17 the wounds like Surgeons to the quick

not skinn it ore to gett a Bishoprick

michah dares tell Samaria of her crimes18

85

what plauges shall follow these Idolatrous times

the mountaines cleane & rocks melt with fier19

Sion20 thy shames are like a purple flood

for thou wert Built on ruine and on blood.

thy head and rulers for reward doe judge

90

michah saith clients doe for justice trudge

and unregarded pas21 salem22 shall be

a chaos made of all deformitie.

and Sion that did once all pleasure yeald

shall be plowed up and made a desart feild.

95

I know our michah would say more then this

But what needs michah when noe sion is.

The sonne doth teach the lesser lamps to shine

and from his flame the drawe a soule devine.

Our torches and our candles doe shine bright

100

because the doe pertake of phoebus23 light.

veiw you our lesser lamps & doe not cease

till thou hast prest our justices of peace.

the common people feare these mightie men

that will not sell a statute for a hen

105

nor from the right and truth one jott decline

for a fatt capon or a bottle of wine.

a loade of coale will starte his conscience warme

for two hee’le keepe his neighbours from all harme.

theise are just magistrates for if they know

110

a robbery that was done a yeare agoe

by one that had a horse of colour gray

if you and I doe chance to ride that way

upon like colourd steeds the yeare after day

the felonie was donne and this foule fact

115

it will be made to appeere to be our act

and by the wisdome of the bench decreed

we were the men did act this wicked deed.

here is true justice, theise are happie states

that governed are by such wise magistrates

120

Il’e leave them now & if my sonne & heire

by chance doe slip into a justice chaire

this precept from his father let him marke

a foolish justice needs a cunninge clearke.

when that the bodie of the tree doth grow

125

straight & upward the branches still are soe

England thy head and members all are straight

though all things ballanst by uneven waight.

mercie and peace in thee togaither kisse

let all the world envie thy happie blisse

130

and let those better witts envie my layes

thatt had the fortune to singe Englands praise

judge right for if you judge amisse the blame

is not the writers but the readers shame.

---

Source. Bodleian MS Eng. Poet. c.50, fols. 30r-31r

K2

Quick links to other poems within this section

Select page here K0. Introduction K1i. Some would complaine K1ii. K1iii. K1iv. K1v. K1vi. K1vii. K1viii. K1ix. K1x. K2. Bridewell I come

¹   Bridewell: London prison for whores and vagabonds, to which a commoner might expect to be committed for unlawful criticism of the state. <back>

²   Some have...that place: these lines are copied directly from a poem on the murder of Sir Thomas Overbury (“Tis painefull rowing gainst the bigg swolne tide”). The second couplet, in both poems, refers to Robert Carr, Earl of Somerset. <back>

³   another...ladies sake: this reference is unclear. <back>

⁴   a third...Baronett: possibly John Holles, who became Baron Holles of Haughton in 1616 after making a payment to the Crown of £10,000 (ten times what the poem suggests). He became first Earl of Clare in 1624, after paying a further £5000. <back>

⁵   a fourth...common knight: this reference is unclear. <back>

⁶   hackney: presumably meant here in the sense of a “horse kept for hire” (OED I.2). <back>

⁷   she that doth...wedd: allusion to the case of Frances Howard, who sued for a nullity of her marriage in 1613, claiming that her husband, Robert Devereux, 3rd Earl of Essex, was impotent (see Section F). <back>

⁸   Has’t thou...Chancery: the Court of Chancery was supposed to operate on laws of conscience and equity, thereby moderating the rigour of the common law. <back>

⁹   Buffe Jerkin: a military jerkin (jacket) of buff-leather. <back>

¹⁰   alminacks: annual books of tables, containing a range of information and forecasts. <back>

¹¹   The racks...cause: unclear; possibly using “rack” in the now obsolete sense of a horse’s gait, in which the two feet on each side are lifted almost simultaneously, and the horse is left entirely without support between the lifting of one pair and the landing of the other (OED). <back>

¹²   pegasus: winged horse of classical mythology. <back>

¹³   defil’d with superstition: like much religious critique of the times, the poem here identifies elements of popery infiltrating the English Church. <back>

¹⁴   simony: the buying or selling of ecclesiastical preferments; or, more generally, traffic in sacred things. <back>

¹⁵   advowson: right of presentation (to an ecclesiastical office). <back>

¹⁶   absalon...haire: Absalom’s luxurious growth of hair, cut annually, is mentioned in 2 Samuel 14.26; here it serves as an image of unchecked pride. <back>

¹⁷   tent: probe (surgically). <back>

¹⁸   michah...crimes: the prophet Micah railed against the sins of Samaria, the ancient capital of Israel. <back>

¹⁹   fier: a gap in the manuscript perhaps indicates the scribe’s recognition of a missing line. <back>

²⁰   Sion: Zion, the hill in Jerusalem which became the centre of Jewish life and worship; here, continues the poem’s alignment of Israel and England. <back>

²¹   pas: probably read “pass.” <back>

²²   salem: another name for Jerusalem. <back>

²³   phoebus: the god of the sun, or the sun personified; here used as an image of the King. <back>